A Woman, in a Relationship

(Disclaimer - Though I am a successful career woman who is more than capable of functioning independently, I UNAPOLOGETICALLY have traditional, Bible-based views on relationships. They aren’t up for debate. ‪#‎sorrynotsorry‬)

As I was reviewing Proverbs 31, God gave me this revelation to share with women:

“As a woman, who you are in your relationship is DESTINED to be vastly different from who your man is. Instead of overanalyzing, rejecting, or comparing your womanly instincts to his manly instincts, OWN them, for they are the true essence of womanhood! And permitting yourself to be a woman is the ONLY way you will feel free and happy, and the only way your relationship will function from the place of divine wholeness that I have ordained it to.

For example, WELL in advance, you will discern needs that he will not realize until they actually become needs. *see verse 15 – ‘She gets up while it is still night and provides food for her family.’”

For the purpose of this post, “family” means partner.

God shows us here that the Proverbs 31 woman begins the process of preparing food for her partner before he even becomes hungry. What would happen had she been insecure about her instincts or spiteful (“He doesn’t wake up early to cook me food, so *insert expletive* him”) and opted instead to ignore her foresight and wait until her partner verbally expressed hunger to begin preparing food? –


First, she’d have been faced with the choice to 1) admit her fault or 2) lie about why she hadn’t prepared. The repercussions of lying are self-explanatory – Ephesians 4:27 says “Do not give the devil a foothold (opportunity to work);” go ahead and introduce lying into your relationship if you want to…


After her initial choice, one of the following scenarios would unfold:


1) She would need to ask her partner to wait for her to thoroughly prepare a meal for him. Prolonged hunger would likely lead to attitudes and arguments – all of which could have been avoided.


2) She would need to rush to “throw something together” to make up for her failure to be obedient to her God-given instincts. Her partner would thus “enjoy” a meal of poor nutritional value & quality, versus the one she could have allotted time to purchase ingredients for, clean, marinate, & season (if applicable), and slow-cook to preserve richness, flavor, and aesthetic appeal.


3) Her partner will have to find his own food though he’d depended on her to. This could open the door for frustration and tension; after all, relationships are partnerships and no one wants a partner they can’t depend on to uphold their end of the bargain.


With all that said – three things: 1) This is bigger than food and should be applied to other areas of life and love. 2) Even women who prepare get sick or have bad days. Obviously you can only do your best; sick and sad best look way different from healthy and happy best. 3) APPRECIATION & RECIPROCATION ARE EVERYTHING, so don’t use what I’ve said as an excuse to allow someone to mistreat you by placing unreasonable demands on you or to be with someone who doesn’t do what he should yet expects you to. ‘Das dead. My only aim here was to paint the picture that men and women are created differently for a reason – because God knew when he created us that partnership would only be effective when each member was equipped with different strengths and convictions. Everyone is able to love better and more when they’re allowed to love in their own love language, so fully embrace your love and womanhood and allow your partner to fully embrace his love and manhood, knowing that he will NEVER EVER EVER --no matter how kindred you two are-- be like you because he is not a woman.


In conclusion, I encourage you to refer to Proverbs 31 so that God can give you revelation of your own.